About five years ago, my schedule was filled with very “important” meetings, weekly travels, complex projects and big transactions… I worked for 14 hours a day, had a big team, was member of several boards and signed a pile of contracts every day. I was taught that this is power and I actually felt powerful. However powerful, I sensed something was missing and I did not know what. I think I missed myself, my innate strength. Well, after many changes on an external and internal level in the past years, I had the chance to fully dedicate myself to house and family in the past two years. Yes, a so-called housewife 🙂 I dived into this learning process and it has been one of the most challenging “life MBAs” that I ever decided to take. No boss, no bonus, no specific targets, no reports, no scale, no preparatory classes, no career plan. I quickly found out what learning by doing actually means and what a self-taught person is. I was willing to make peace with my feminine energy and to rediscover a strength that I forgot I have. It does not happen at once (as my pragmatic masculine wished) but it takes time, patience and self compassion to allow the flower to bloom. I learned to identify the mood of my daughter coming back home by the sound of her steps in the stairway. I learned to listen with presence when she shared her pain and concerns, not wanting to solve the issue like a closing checklist of an M&A transaction. I learned to clean the house with care, with the intention of letting go all that is no longer useful and welcoming the new with freshness. I learned to cook with spontaneity and simplicity, choosing ingredients that resonated with my body. I learned to wash cloths thanking them for their service and asking that they continue protecting us, specially in cold days. I learned to tidy our beds imagining how powerful a good sleep can recover us from a difficult day and give us hope when we wake up the next day. I learned to clean the toilets thanking for all that nurtured our body and for all that was eliminated. I learned to massage the feet of my daughter with lavender oil when she went to bed and to imagine they will take her the next day wherever she needs to be. I learned to ask other woman for help when I was in need and, most importantly, I learned to accept their help. I learned to dance with the broom in the living room and to sing “don’t worry be happy” swinging my brand new cleaning gloves. I learned to laugh about myself when the bread recipe went wrong and my husband suggested the ducks might enjoy it more. I learned to cry out deep emotions and to sleep on the sofa in the afternoon when no energy was left. I learned to prepare a nice happy hour and to choose a relaxing music when my husband came from work and needed to slow down. I learned to plant herbs and to use them in food, water and tea. I learned about the power of simple things. Do I do this every day at all times? Of course not. But I feel the difference when I’m present. I realized that therein lies my strength. The power to create harmony, justice and beauty with simplicity. The power of love.
julianepfeiffer201
Comments